Week 8 NFL Picks

Alright, I know this is late... so you can quit bugging me about it. I am also aware that there is no movie review this week. The only movie worth watching this week was Boondock Saints 2... and they aren't even showing it my fucking area. I even live in a big metropolitan area... but nope, we are good enough. I blame the local NFL team. It is their fault. In fact I am going place of play and boo them tomorrow.

And yeah, I sucked it up last week... and fell further behind San Antonio... and Baby Girl is catching up. Lame. I really have to step it up like Mike Tyson's acting in the Hangover.

Sunday's Games

Texans @ Bills

The Texans are looking pretty good recently... and the Bills, not so much. Bills remind me of a stripper over $40. It isn't that great, but you will take it for the discounted price. Texans should wrap up before they take the plunge, but they will come out with a clean win.

Browns @ Bears

I still don't think the Bears are that great, but the Browns are worse. Bears should have no trouble.

Seahawks @ Cowboys

Alright, the Hawks are really inconsistent... but so are the Boys. Yeah, the Boys beat the Falcons, but that doesn't mean shit. This year has been the year for former players to kill their opposing teams. Shockey to the Giants... Farve to the Packers... Benson to the Bears... I think Julius Jones will kick the crap out of the Boys. Sorry Cowgirls, come back next Sunday.

Rams @ Lions

Rams still suck... Lions do too. But the Lions have a win. But the Rams have Steven Jackson. I am actually going to pick the Rams. I think they can muster one out... but just one.

Niners @ Colts

The Niners have been the most disappointing team of the year. They do a great job of making baby Jesus cry. Do they stand a chance against the Colts.... I think so. Why? Because of the new faith in an old flame. Alex Smith will give the Colts their first lose. Laugh if you want, but I think I will be right on this one. Upset Special!

Dolphins @ Jets

Dolphins have put up a great fight against the greatest teams in the league this year. The Jets are not one of those teams. In fact, they beat the Jets already. I expect a sequel.

Broncos @ Ravens

The Ravens seem to be falling apart in my eyes. The Broncos are so hot, you need tongs to touch them. Ravens will figure this out pretty quick.

Giants @ Eagles

Eagles are coming back strong. Giants are on the down hill. The NFC is starting to look competitive within. I am taking the Eagles. Giants need to find some way to start playing better. This week is not there week. That is what Marvin Gaye and I heard from the grapevine.

Jaguars @ Titans

Titans look like shit. Except white and baby blue shit. Jags don't look great either, but they should be beat the Titans. All they have to do is tell Vince Young he sucks. He will break down and it will be smooth sailing after that.

Raiders @ Chargers

I picked the Raiders and it cost me. I am not making that mistake again. Chargers going to run over them like the Jets. Car crash they are probably going to play on CBS just because they have a knack for showing the worst possible game on.

Vikings @ Packers

A sequel I see ending the same. Farve will come out with some cool toys, save the world with the help of a friend. There will be smoking hot girl and the world will be saved. Maybe that is how all the Bond movies are, but this one should go along the same lines. Same shit, different stadium.

Panthers @ Cardinals

Cardinals looked good last week, and I don't see those looks changes. They didn't even shower. Kept all their makeup on. I look for a repeat performance and a standing ovation from a red sea.

Monday's Game

Falcons @ Saints

The Dolphins had the best shot at beating the Saints. They are showing to be unstoppable. If the Falcons lost to the Cowgirls, then they are weak sauce. Saints are doing some Cajun cooking where weak sauce is tossed out for the spicy shit. Falcons don't stand a chance, 35-10

Birddogger Out.